Blog, Family

“Part 2: Raising Godly Daughters”

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Raising my Daughter

I understand that a lot of women (not all) these days, think men are horrible, perverted, dominating creatures and while that may be true for some men, that’s also true for some women too, lest you forget. There are just bad people in this world, and we can’t use them as an excuse to treat the entire population of men (or population of women) like they are the exact same. Not everyone is so, horribly perverted. 

“I can do all things through Christ…”

  I will raise my daughter to know that she is preparing for a man that will raise children, and love the Lord well, with her. Most often, I hear that women don’t need a man bossing them around, or taking control over them. It’s the “I can do everything myself, and no man gets to tell me what to do” way of thinking. That perspective will lead you down a self-righteous, selfish path. It is only through, and because of God that anything is made possible, so we should not lead a life, with the view of being our own boss. If we lead ourselves, it will surely be straight into sin.

Lets raise our daughters to respect men, and to help them understand that good men, respect and honor us too. Teach them to first, be for God, and secondly, to find a husband who will lead them to God.

As a mother, it is our job to show our daughters what a mother should be like; how to nurture, how to care for others, and how to be a Godly wife. If you’re a father, it is your job to show your daughters what a Godly man looks like, and how they provide and protect the household. Good men lead you to the Lord, take care of you, and protect you from harm. Together as both parents, we need to show our children what a Godly marriage looks like, when the Lord is the foundation.  

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The enemy hates marriage, and he hates family, because it is something God loves and blesses people with. He tries to tear it all apart using the world, as his accomplice. The world, encourages you to give in to all of your temptations to sin, it encourages anything that dishonors God. Getting you to stray from your marriage, and family in this day and age is unfortunately, an easy task for the devil. So, our children need all the guidance they can get from us.

Let’s keep our eyes on the Lord, so our children can be encouraged to do the same. The enemy does not care if you idolize him in the process, he just wants you to idolize anything, but God.

Sexual Sin:

The world right now, is very sexual. It is all about bodies, and what to do with them. I won’t go too far into how they encourage these kinds of behaviors, because we can all use our imagination on how they spread this around, but it encourages sex and sexual behavior to our young children and it is just going to get worse. We need to be proactive in talking and having discussions with them on what and why, certain things are sinful, and what God truly designed sex for. Because, he did indeed, design it!

1 Corinthians 10:31 (ESV) “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”

I encourage parents to leave openings for these kinds of conversations, and even have weekly discussions on these topics. Especially, if any of your children are in public schools! It may seem difficult if you aren’t in the habit of doing so, but it is quite easy to get in the habit of discussing worldly issues, and what the Bible says. My husband and I do it almost daily. Debates are fun, at our house! and we firmly believe they are a healthy thing to exercise! Proverbs 27:17 (ESV) “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.”

On my list to read next as well!

I encourage you,

Welcome debates on any worldly issues vs God’s word with your kids! It will build confidence, and help them learn to combat those faith-testing questions they will get in the future! Worldly “truths” VS the truth!

What If I Don’t Find Someone?

Can a woman live a blessed and happy life, if she never finds and gets married to a good man? Yes, absolutely! It’s called celibacy. We are blessed, as soon as we accept Jesus into our hearts. We don’t need a marriage, for that. The good news is, the Lord loves to bless people with families! He loves the unity/covenant made between a husband and a wife. So, instead of instilling into our daughters that they can do without a man entirely, and that they can love whenever and whoever they want in replacement, let’s change our perspective away from that negative, and unbiblical outlook. We all, need God.

Be Encouraging:

It’s not a sin to have temptations towards sinful things, it becomes a sin when you act upon them. So let’s help lift up our children to the Lord, especially if and when they start to have those temptations.

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Encourage young girls, to prepare for a marriage and family, to be a wife one day, and encourage them to find a good, Godly man. Church groups and many people i’ve seen, have a tendency to emphasize singleness, but they never emphasize that it’s a time of preparation, before starting a family. It’s as if they are scared their young congregation will be lovestruck over every guy (or gal, if you’re a guy) if they emphasize finding one, while young. Maybe not every place does this, but i’ve personally seen a common theme.

 Churches, maybe subconsciously, encourage young adults to stay single, by staying away from guidance and advice on marriage to young adults/teen, and the world encourages any sexual behavior. You put two and two together and what does that get you?

I’m not against being in a season of singleness, I think there are still plenty people (and have been plenty people) who have lived celibate, in their walk with Christ and that’s great! Everyone is in a season of singleness, at least once in their lives, and it is beneficial! However, I do believe that the Lord gives us that time to get close to Him, prepare for a family, and start our “search.” We don’t have to revolve around guys, and be that “obsessed girl after everyone in her sight” in order to do so either! It isn’t unbiblical to use that time to prepare for marriage and a family; for women to seek a husband, and men to seek a wife and to stay pure for your future significant other, until you’re married! All this to say, you must first and foremost, seek the Lord, and continue to do so, married or not!

Marriage may not be a part of everyones life, but I do think it’s still something we can make sure we are at least ready for, if it does happen! Especially, by counseling teens/young adults, about marriage! I know people make mistakes and sometimes things have already been done, but that is why the Lord forgives! and that is why we need to forgive. Whether it be forgiving someone else, or ourselves for things we’ve done in the past, If you are burdened by a sexual sin, I encourage you to pray, repent, forgive, and move on. 

Being able to give that example to our children, especially in this sexually driven world is worth so much.   

To be continued..

Blog, Family

“Part 1: Raising Godly Daughters”

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Uniquely Made:

Men and women are made for each other. Women are not made for women, and men are not made for men. Women can give birth and become mothers; men cannot. Men, can become fathers, they can go out and work hard, grueling hours of painful, physical labor; women cannot. We were not made to go out to do what men do, or even try to be a father to our children. Men are not meant to try to be the mothers either. We [women] were made to do what we are specifically designed for; Wifehood, motherhood, caretaking, nurturing, homemaking etc.

Feminism:

I’m not a feminist whatsoever. I will not agree with, or raise my daughter(s) to stand for something that takes away the exact thing it thinks its standing for; femininity. We don’t have to be naked to be feminine. We don’t have to hate men, to be feminine, and we shouldn’t idolize ourselves as “a goddess” like this world promotes, so often. We should not promote such things to our girls. We are beautiful already and we are very strong, in our own ways. We are not men, and we are definitely not a god.  

Why do women have to make it a competition against men, on “who is better?”

Are women so insecure about themselves, that they feel the need to become men, or to prove they are better than? or even just to prove they are better than everyone (men and women) by trying to become something, entirely made up?

Not Made To Be The Same:

Men and women are not made to be the same, both have strengths that the other does not. That is the beauty of the entire thing! That’s one of the many reasons why a man and a woman are meant to be together. They compliment each other the exact way, God intended them to. Ephesians 5:31 (ESV) “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

The blessing that we have as women to carry a child, and have our bodies go through those processes (our cycles, our pregnancies, and even through our struggles with both); be encouraged in that, because a man could never do that! If you’re a man be encouraged in the hard work you do to provide and protect your family; be encouraged in being the head of the house, that you can father your children, because a woman could never take the place of a dad!

As a woman, I am so grateful to my husband for doing that painful, hard, physical labor and being a father to our child. It is a true blessing and God-given privilege to have someone who protects us and provides for our family. A woman is meant to be cared for by a husband who protects and provides for her and their children. The Lord intended for there to be that unity, of marriage and family. It’s a true, blessing. Now, this isn’t to say that people who are living as celibate for example, aren’t blessed, if you love the Lord as your savior, then you’re already blessed! Marriage isn’t what brings forth blessings into your life, the Lord is who brings the blessings, into your life.

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I will raise my daughter to know that men are the leaders of families and we honor them as such. I will also teach her, that a God-fearing man will honor and respect a woman as the delicate, yet strong heir of the grace of life that we are.

The Verses:

–  1 Peter 3:7 (ESV) “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

Ephesians 5:22 (ESV) “Wives submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”

Eph 5:25 (ESV) “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,”

Titus 2:4-5 (ESV) “and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands that the word of God may not be reviled.”

This scripture in Titus, goes on to talk about sons as well, but that is not what we are discussing today. All of these verses I used, are ones I’ve personally heard people use when they are arguing against men and women’s specific commands, from the Lord. 

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Breaking Down The Verses:

I know a lot of people just think that the Bible says that women are weak, submissive, and all they do is slave away to men. In reality, that is far from the truth. 

Women are held, and should be held in honor and respect, as it says! When God grants that authority to men (or authority to anyone in general) it is always for the blessing of protection of those under it. Anybody who uses their God-given authority to their own advantage at the cost of those under it, will have to answer to the Lord who gave it to them in the first place; men, government, anyone.

Most people just see “women— weak.” If you have the biblical understanding that men are the leaders of their families, then you should be able to understand that when it says “weaker vessel” it is because we are physically weaker, than men. It also says, we are heirs. Men are supposed to show honor to the women, because we are the heirs of the grace of life with them, how can we always skip over that part?

The commands given to the men, are for a husband to love his wife (Ephesians 5:25, ESV). When the husband’s authority is mentioned here, it is simply stated as a fact, not a command. The Lord didn’t say “husbands, go practice your authority over your wives” He did say “love your wives.”

From a biblical perspective, women are to be the mothers, caretakers, and homemakers. While the men are to be the fathers, providers, and protectors. Both are to be honored and respected.

This is the study guide version! I will get this for our family as well, for dinner time talk!

We [women] are put under our husband’s authority, because they are meant to be the head of the house just, as Christ is the head of the church (Ephesians5:23). If both husband and wife focus on their God-given responsibilities to one another, and take care of their relationship, there will be peace, and not a war between the two. Obviously, we are not a sinless, perfect people, but the point of this is, biblical women are not meant to be “slaves”, and biblical men are not meant to be their abuser.

As well as, only men are meant to be the father, just as only women are meant to be the mother, of their family.

So when we raise our daughters up, let’s teach them, and show them how to be the wife the Lord has intended for us to be. If you are a husband and father, teach and show your daughters how the Lord intended a Godly man to be as well! As we teach our daughters about wifehood and motherhood, it is not just us moms, but the dads too, that need to show them a great example of what a husband and wife should be. We must provide a Godly example of these things, to our children!

The world is not going to do it for us, let alone, help us in any way.

To be continued..

Blog, Family

“Part 1: What Do I Do With The Truth, and How Do I Help My Children With It?”

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I have a great friend, we’ve been friends for a few years now, and go out to talk at least once every couple months! We will call her Jane (not her real name). Jane, knows of God, and of Christianity, but we personally, don’t really ever talk about biblical things. I went over to her house this last week, and walked in on something, horrifying. I walked in on her with a needle that was just about to go into her right arm.

I obviously panicked, and asked what was going on and she says this, “Jo, you are the only Christian friend I have and If you loved me, you would let me be and just accept this. If you do, you won’t have to worry about our relationship changing. I mean, as a Christian you’re supposed to be loving anyways, right?”

She continued, “If you don’t accept me like this, its going to break my heart to be judged so harshly, by you. I won’t see you as my friend anymore, and honestly we will never speak again. Please just be a good friend to me, and don’t say anything. I don’t want to lose our relationship, you weren’t supposed to see this anyways.”

What if this happened to you or your child, What advice would you give them? What would you do?

While this is not a true story for me; for some people, it may be.

 I have seen people, go through similar things. Different addictions, different desires that had taken control. Our children, need us to help them build confidence in their faith, to withstand these kinds of peer pressuring, manipulative people that they will more than likely come across, at least once in their lifetime. Allowing yourself or your children to have close relationships with people who try to entice you to leave your faith at the side lines for their feelings and for their sins, is extremely risky. Telling someone they are in the wrong, and offering them help to get them out of that sin, is plenty biblical. We are to confront sin, and help fellow sinners, by lifting them up! But we can’t be a friend of the world, and a friend of God.

Personally, if this exact scenario happened to me, I would tell her this;

“Jane, I don’t know what happened to you, but listen to me now, this is not right, this is a sin, you could die doing this and It’s not honoring to the Lord. I can help you find resources, I can pray for you, we can find other people to help you. You can hate me if you want to, you can tell me to walk out and never come back, but it doesn’t change the fact that this is sinful, and harmful.”

If you lose that relationship in the process, then God will mend your hurting heart. We cannot succumb to encouraging/condoning someone’s sins, or tolerating their sins for the sake of keeping a relationship with them. Jesus did not tolerate sin, He tolerated sinners. Humans commit sins, but have been able to repent, and be washed clean of them, only because Jesus died on the cross for His children; us.

Wouldn’t we tell our children to say something, to speak up and try to help even with the risk of losing that friend forever? and if the answer is no, then Why?

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Surely our Relationship with God, is more important than a relationship here on earth.  We cannot save someone who does not want to be saved, and we definitely will not do it better than God himself. So yes, try to help and pray, but don’t chase people who are not willing, and who are continuously throwing your efforts and the gospel, in the trash. Let God work in them, because at that point there is truly nothing else we can do, but take a step back from their destruction, get your children away from their destruction, pray and be still..

When we put God first in our marriage, it thrives.

When we put God first in our friendships, they thrive.

When we put God first, *fill in the blank* will thrive.

Compassion:

This is not to say we as Christians are so, utterly perfect, we still make plenty of mistakes. It will be difficult to tell someone (that you hold very dear), that there is another option than this sin, it is accepting the Lord Jesus as their savior and repenting of what they are doing, like that [example of] a horrible addiction mentioned above, because He is the way to eternal life, and not death. Those who go against God, hate the truth and they hate those who speak it.

Compassion isn’t ignoring truth, it’s speaking truth, even if people hate it. Do not get it twisted, that in order to be compassionate and loving, you cannot confront their sins, because it’s “not your place.” That is absolutely not the case, and it’s not what Jesus encouraged or exemplified. We can be gentle and honest at the same time.

Judge the sin, but do not judge the sinner, who committed it.

I know first hand, how difficult it is to have loved ones become harmful, and to have to break away from those relationships, especially when it’s to protect your children. Because they have either rejected the Lord, or they do know him, yet, do not care enough to acknowledge they are sinning against Him. I still don’t understand how someone can reject the Lord and His goodness, as well as cast hate upon him and people who love him, so easily. Family or friend, protect your children from having close relationships that are fruitless, and destructive. Our children are the most vulnerable.

We need to stop saying things so predominantly and broad like we have been– such as, “Don’t judge, judging is bad!” As a Christian, it is our place to say “Hey, this is not honoring to God, and is a sin that you should not continue committing. We can pray together, and find resources to help you break away from this, but it needs to stop.” As well as, point them in the Bible, to where it clarifies that it isn’t honoring to the Lord

Doing things like this, can be seen as judging someone, especially to people who want to be affirmed in their sin, and affirmed in their feelings. Regrettably, we all have done that; wanted to be told we are right, just because something hurt our feelings. I know that I have, many times. Where they are saying things like “if you loved me, you wouldn’t do this!” If it is something that goes against God and His word, than it is very much our place to say so, and to offer them a helping hand in breaking free from such! They should do the same for you as well, when they see you fall and stumble in your walk of faith.

I’ve read this book, and it has great points! Definitely recommend.

Verses:

– Don’t forget what we are fighting; not the sinner, the sin.

 Ephesians 6:12 (ESV) “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.”

  • If you are afraid to confront sin, to have confrontations, or just afraid of rejection. Maybe you’re just utterly afraid to hurt someone, even while knowing it’s the truth you are speaking. I encourage you to read these verses and then both of these chapters, fully.

Psalm 94:14 (ESV) “For the Lord will not forsake his people; he will not abandon his heritage;”

Ephesians 4:15 (ESV) “ Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into christ,”

  • Test the word before you confront someone about a potential sin, making sure that this is something that is truly not honoring to the Lord, and is actually causing them to stumble before God. We are meant to lift our brothers/sisters in Christ up, not tear them down. Point them to the truth, and pray for them, regardless if the truth is horribly unappealing to the ears to hear, say it anyways. That, is far from tearing them down. I even encourage you, if they don’t agree with you and think you’re absolutely absurd, have them point out in the Bible where what they are doing, stands for being honoring to God. Talk this out, and pray for each other. Something like this shouldn’t really be a short conversation. It may not be an easy one, either.

John 14:6 (ESV) “Jesus said to him, I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

2 Timothy 2:24-26 (ESV) ”And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will.”

1 Thessalonians 5:21 (ESV) “But test everything; hold fast to what is good.

James 5:16 (ESV) “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.”

Bringing the bible into those conversations, pointing out what part of the scriptures that makes you so firmly believe whatever they are doing goes against God, will help immensely; rather than you just saying “oh, it’s cause the bible says so.” However, this is not an opportunity to become prideful, and self-righteous over someone who is struggling. While we are saved by the grace of God (once we accept Jesus into our hearts), we all still make sinful errors and we must remember, we are called to lift others up. This is what we discuss next. 

To Be Continued…

Blog, Family

“Trusting The Lord, While Moving Your Family.”

From a hike in Oregon, we did on our honeymoon.

Dream Home

I have a good list when it comes to where I want our family to settle down at. I want to have a farm on 5+ acres, I want to have room for our kids to play in our own orchards and pastures, with plenty of farm animals. I dream of a small, cosy home right in the middle of it all, where I make all their meals and we gather with family. Most importantly somewhere safe, and hopefully a great community around us. With the world the way it is right now, I have come to find that I’ve asked myself, and God quite often if that is selfish, or if that is not meant to be for us. Regardless, I know I will still love our life, just as I do now if we never have that specific, down to every detail, dream.

Housing Market

We have always kept an eye on the housing market just in case something golden shows up out of no where, but every piece of it that we pursue turns to dust and we get the door shut in our face. It’s frustrating, not knowing where we will move, what we will get, and how it will turn out, but I know God provides and He has not failed us yet, nor will He ever. We found a beautiful property, a great price for 7 acres, it was close to both our families, and it even had a sweet old, 1900s (falling apart) house on it. It was the “something golden” we were looking for, so I thought. It seemed so fitting for us! We tried to go after it, and it didn’t work out. Then it got re-listed 2 months later! We tried again, and still couldn’t do it. We had gotten our hopes up over that property, but it wasn’t the right one for us. 

The Lord’s Plan, is Not Our Own.

Where we will be putting down roots and settling our family, is so unknown. My husband and I talk all the time about where we see ourselves building a home, and honestly it used to be we saw ourselves right here forever, but not anymore. As far as we can see, of course. If it’s here in this state, or across the entire USA, I really could not tell you. Regardless of where we see ourselves, I’ve accepted the fact that God has different, better plans for our future. I felt pretty guilty for the way I acted beforehand, being frustrated when I just needed some patience. I know the Lord is good, and I know He takes care of us. So, I changed my attitude, I prayed [for forgiveness], and I thanked my husband for being encouraging.

I’ve told the Lord so often, that I’m thankful for having what we need, that I will be happy with whatever we have, regardless of the specific requests I’ve given. As long as our little, growing family is healthy and safe, I’m happy! With what is going on in the world, everything is so uncertain; safety is so uncertain, and not because of sickness, but because there is so much hatred down every corner. It can be scary, especially if you have little ones to take care of. I just encourage you to trust the Lord, He will provide. So, as hard as it is, I’m trying not to worry too much about where we will end up, and where we will build a home, because it’s already taken care of by the good Lord himself.

An Oregon beach.

If you are also hoping to move your family right now, you probably know how difficult it is to find something and how dangerous the world is right now, on top of everything. Maybe, you even had your mind set on a specific property that didn’t end up working out. I’m here to tell you, I understand the frustration and the worry, but God is still good! His plans for our lives cannot be altered by anyone, but Him. As for the worry of the dangers that this world holds; be smart and proactive, but don’t let fear control you. As for dreaming of a farm, or whatever your dream home is, I’d say it’s okay to want that as long as you are happy with what you have currently! I’ve seen the Lord work in other people’s lives, and I’ve definitely seen Him work in our lives! So I don’t doubt He has a wonderful home, just waiting for us (and for you) to find. Just keep working towards it!

In the meantime, I will give thanks for what we do have, and I will pray for the things we hope for. We all have a tendency to become selfish in our desires; It’s a sinful fault that we all have, unfortunately. We just need to be thankful for the things that we have been given no matter how small. However! that’s another topic for another time and I don’t want to trail off. I just encourage you to also, give thanks for what you have, pray for what you hope for, and have patience in the waiting because the Lord does provide.

Blog, Family

“Our Little Girl, and Why There Are No Portraits.”

First beach trip. A success! (this live sand dollar was put back)

The Reasoning:

My Husband and I have always been fairly private people, only telling close friends and family the details of our life. With starting a blog that is about our life, I knew we would be sharing much more than we’re used to. While public/social platforms can bring encouragement, inspiration, and help connect people. It can also bring unwanted attraction, and it has people on it who will, and do violate other’s privacy. While there is a lot of good people, there unfortunately will always be bad people too.

Our child is still pretty young, barely a year old! My husband and I have made the decision to keep her and future kid’s faces, off the blog and off social platforms. The wide web does have its perks, but because of the dangers that it holds and how easy it can be to find things and people by using it, we are just trying to be cautionary to keep our sweet, little ones safe. We will try to keep their faces off the internet’s feed, for as long as we can. Social media, does collect our personal information and that’s not something we feel too comfortable with, especially when it comes to our children. 

We know that there is already information and photos about our life on these platforms and such, but because our child hasn’t really been on there yet, we want to give her a fresh start away from social platforms. We also don’t want to continue to feed those collections with our personal photos, and information. Unfortunately, it is dangerously easy to find out anything about whoever you want, through public records and social media. All you really need is some free time, and patience to dig into the past.

Nature walks, with her Daddy. Who obviously, is in deep thought.

As For Us:

We’ve both had social media accounts and have had our pictures everywhere so we are much more loose with our own photos, just because they are already on everything anyways. We will most definitely still talk about how we raise our kids, and kid-related things on this blog and social platforms. They will also be known on our Rabbitry page too! The only difference is, you won’t see portraits of them or know too much personal details about them. I understand the mystery of that! but we like it better this way, at least for now. 

Reminder:

If you are one of the many parents out there that does it differently, we are not trying to attack you at all! Like I said before, social platforms can be a great way to connect, especially if you have relatives or close friends that you don’t get to see often! We are just sharing our personal reasons, so that it doesn’t seem too weird that we say we have a child, but then her cute little face, is never shown.

Our future:

Right now, we are trying to find a balance between blogging about our life, and not sharing too much at the same time! As our child gets older, and we have more kids, we might reconsider putting up all their photos, but it will be a while. So I hope you still enjoy these other photos that I try to add! Our little one is still a very big part of our life, obviously, so I can’t leave her out of the blog, too much. On that note, I will add just a couple fun facts! 

Her name is Beatrice, and we love her so! She has much to learn, but knows everything somehow as an almost one year old. We can’t wait to have more little ones, and fill our house with more little smiling faces! So again, everyone does it differently, and I hope you enjoy the pictures I will add in replacement to all the, more personal portraits.